FRIEND: Nice old house. Is it haunted?
FRIEND: Really? By who?
WIFE: [from kitchen] YOU LOADED THE DISHWASHER WRONG.
ME: The ghost of my mother.
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) March 7, 2018
I’m a Clinton supporter, as you know. But what may not be entirely clear is that I don’t just support her because the alternative is Trump.
That is a sufficient reason to support Clinton. That is a sufficient reason to support anyone. If the Democrats were running a chimpanzee against Trump, I’d support the chimpanzee.
And yet there’s more to it with me and Clinton. I think she’ll be a good president. Or, to be more precise, I think she has the POTENTIAL to be a good president. Maybe even one of our greatest Presidents, on a caliber with the Roosevelts and Harry S. Truman.
I got in a conversation with a Clinton-hater the other day, who declared that she is the most paranoid Presidential candidate since Richard Nixon, and her administration would quickly, like Nixon’s second term, become paralyzed by scandals of her own invention.
Since then, I’ve surprised myself to find I agree with my friend. She IS paranoid. Justifiably so, given her career of being dogged by Republicans who make up lies about her and spread them to millions of willing supporters. Republicans lied that she’s a closet lesbian, they lied that she murdered Vince Foster, they lied that she made money on insider real estate deals in Arkansas (in fact the Clintons LOST money). They lied that she faked being sick during the first Benghazi hearings, and they are lying now that she is faking being essentially healthy other than pneumonia that she’ll get over. Republicans lie that she has somehow coopted three Republican prosecutors who have cleared her of wrongdoing that would get anybody else thrown in prison. Etc. etc. etc. I’m sure there’s a list somewhere of all the Republican lies about Hillary Clinton.
And yet paranoia would be Clinton’s undoing. Even if it is justified.
There’s an old joke that goes: Are you paranoid if they really ARE out to get you? That’s supposed to be a rhetorical question, with the answer: No. Paranoia, according to the premise of the joke, is the DELUSION of persecution. No delusion, no paranoia.
But the reality is you can be both paranoid and persecuted. And that’s Clinton’s problem.
Why should we hire you?
*imagines octopus shooting ink in my face, tentacle choking me and calling me whore*
I like animals.
— orange shirt guy (@awkwardphilippe) May 7, 2015
Chris Scott, a “regular guy,” sent this tweet out to his 1,000 followers in May:
Oh hi Becky who refused to kiss me during spin the bottle in 6th grade & now wants to play FarmVille, looks like tables have fucking turned
— Chris Scott (@iamchrisscott) May 15, 2014
Just a few months later, the tweet has been retweeted over 18,000 times, plagiarized by dozens, and Scott, 30, was even accused by a widely followed comedian of stealing the joke from an MTV show called “Guy Code,” a program Scott had never heard of or seen….
The 30-year-old Boston resident is not a famous comedian. He, like so many other active Twitter users, uses the social network to access news and culture in real time.
So what happened to this tweet? Scott gave Business Insider some insight into what he saw when his harmless, funny joke, went massively viral.
Sounds like a bit of a pain, actually