Husbands often go crazy when on business trips (see for example: Don Draper). I am no exception. Like, when I’m at home I stay away from diet soda because of its questionable health effects and because Julie says it makes me spacey. But right now I’m drinking a 20-ounce Diet Coke.
It’s just a short step from here to underwear on my head.
Bill Maher: “Hillary has to embrace all the nasty things the haters say and run as the Notorious HRC.”
In character as Notorious HRC: “When Donald Trump gets angry at someone he sends out a mean-girl tweet in the middle of the night. That’s cute. Here’s me killing bin Laden. And Gaddafi’s ass is a little sore these days too.”
Hilarious. I love it. And there’s truth here. Americans don’t want “sweet grandma Hillary.”
Also: “Try as I might, I cannot make my brain work like a Trump voter. Maybe it’s my mother not drinking when she was pregnant.”
Hellaciously excellent rant by Kristi Coulter, who says women need to drink to live in the world created by and for men:
Do you remember the Enjoli perfume commercial from the 1970s? The chick who could bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget you’re a man?
I blame that bitch for a lot. For spreading the notion that women should have a career, keep house, and fuck their husbands, when the only sane thing to do is pick two and outsource the third. For making it seem glamorous. For suggesting it was going to be fun. And for the tagline she dragged around: “The 8-Hour Perfume for the 24-Hour Woman.” Just in case you thought you could get one fucking hour off the clock.
Plenty more where that came from.
I’m drinking less and less as I get older. It’s not a moral or health choice. I’m just more aware that I don’t like it most of the time. And I’m more aware that much of the time I used to drink, I was just drinking to fit in. Every now and then, I do like a nice beer or a glass of wine or a martini or Jameson’s rocks. But I often go weeks or months without partaking, and don’t miss it.