“Pecker picked the wrong dick to shaft”

Dave Pell: “In a Dickensian saga perfectly reflective of our times, AMI, the David Pecker-headed parent company of The National Enquirer, attempted to extort Jeff Bezos with a below the belt threat to expose his prime member. But Pecker picked the wrong dick to shaft.”


It’s not likely, but possible, that this incident could destroy the Trump Presidency and wouldn’t that be a fitting end to the Donald farce? His Fraudulency brought down not by treason, hundreds of billions of dollars of money laundering, but because one of his buddies threatened to publish the wrong guy’s dick pic.

One of Pecker’s failed calculations is that dick picks just aren’t a big deal anymore. As long as they’re between consenting adults nobody cares.

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